Kristine’s Quiz
You are driving down the road in your car on a wild, stormy night, when you pass by a bus stop and you see three people waiting for the bus:
1. An old lady who looks as if she is about to die.
2. An old friend who once saved your life.
3. The perfect partner you have been dreaming about.
Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing that there could only be one passenger in your car? Think before you continue reading.
This is a moral/ethical dilemma that was once actually used as part of a job application. You could pick up the old lady, because she is going to die, and thus you should save her first. Or you could take the old friend because he once saved your life, and this would be the perfect chance to pay him back. However, you may never be able to find your perfect mate again.
YOU WON’T BELIEVE THIS…………………
The candidate who was hired (out of 200 applicants) had no trouble coming up with his answer. He simply answered: ‘I would give the car keys to my old friend and let him take the lady to the hospital. I would stay behind and wait for the bus with the partner of my dreams.’
Sometimes, we gain more if we are able to give up our stubborn thought limitations.
Never forget to ‘Think Outside of the Box.’
HOWEVER…., The correct answer is to run the old lady over and put her out of her misery because Obama’s health care won’t pay for her hospital visit anyway, have sex with the perfect partner on the hood of the car, then drive off with the old friend for a few beers.
Kisses ~ Kristine Cumz
Kristine Cumz Sunday Night Dreaming!
So what is that old saying about having too much sugar or something before you go to bed, makes you have odd dreams? I had one Sunday night and couldn’t wait to tell y’all!
You know how in dreams things don’t always make sense, well here was mine:
I was in a beachside bar wearing heels and a halter top. Apparently the halter wasn’t big enough because one of my big titties was hanging out! I didn’t have anything on the bottom – no skirt, no jeans, no shorts, no panties – nothing! But I did have my heels on! I was walking through the bar with people around and then I went in to the beer cooler!
I hate when dreams end like that, don’t you? I wanted to know the rest of the story! Was there some hot cocks in that beer cooler? Was I going to get a beer to cool off my hot pussy?
Anyway, I just thought it was too good not to share – hope you liked it! Send me an Email and let me know what you think happened next!
Kisses ~ Kristine Cumz
www.KristineCumz.com
Kristine’s Funny Story – well, Now it is!
The other day I decided to do a bunch of stuff around the house! I thought I would get it all done so my husband didn’t have to worry about any of it, and we could just play and have fun! I’m nice like that! LOL
The first thing I did was clean the new pool! It was sparkling, it looked sooooo good! I was so proud of myself!
The bike really needed washed but even when I wash it, he usually moves it out of the garage for me, but since I was feeling pretty good with my pool cleaning abilities and I really wanted to surprise him with all the chores being done, I decided to move it myself! That’s when the fun started!
So I get on the bike and start rolling it backward, doing pretty good until I hit a hump in the driveway. That’s when I realize just how heavy this damn bike is! But I keep pushing away at it and finally get it.
I get it out of the garage, and probably should have just stopped then but I was feeling like Wonder Woman! It’s crooked in the driveway and I decide that I need to reposition it, so I start rolling it back further and then start to reposition it and pull it forward again. Well there is another hump and this one I just can’t push my way through it!
What to do? What to do? I’ve actually driven motorcycles in the past, it was quite a while ago but I have done it. So I’m thinking how much harder can it be to drive this big ass Harley a couple feet….not that hard, right? Wonder woman can do it!
I won’t go through the whole story that my husband got, but I will suffice to say that I seriously had my life flash before my eyes and I thought I was going to end up through the garage and into the house!! I screamed like a little girl and by the time was SAFELY where I wanted it, I was shaking like a leaf!
After I thought about all of this, I realized what I used to ride was a Kawasaki 440 which is definitely a bit lighter than a Harley FLSTC!
Would you believe, though, there wasn’t a scratch on the bike and I didn’t get hurt at all? My husband asked if I would do this again….after thinking for a minute or two, I told him that yeah I probably would! I mean after all, Wonder Woman is still going strong, right!?!? (I think he is hiding the keys from me now!)
The moral of this story? Hell if I know! LOL
Kisses ~ Kristine Cumz
Can Your Pecker Touch Your Ass?
A five year old boy and his grandpa are sitting on the front porch
together, when gramps pulls a beer out of his cooler
The little boy asks: ‘Can I have a beer Grandpa?’
Grandpa replies: ‘Can your pecker touch your ass?’
The little boy answered : ‘No Grandpa. It’s just a little pecker’.
Gramps says: ‘Well then, you’re not man enough to have a beer’.
A little later Grandpa lights up a cigar.
The little boy asks: ‘Can I have a cigar Grandpa?’
Once again, Grandpa asks: ‘Can your pecker touch your ass?’
Once again the little boy replies, ‘No, it’s too little’.
Gramps replies, ‘Then you’re not man enough to have a cigar’.
A little later the little boy comes out of the house with milk and
some cookies.
Grandpa asks, ‘Hey there young feller, can I have a cookie ?’
The boy ask, ‘Can your pecker touch your ass?’
Gramps replies, ‘Hell yes, my pecker can touch my ass’.
The little boy replies, ‘Then go fuck yourself’. Grandma made these for me’.
Kisses ~ Kristine Cumz
Adorable Computer Humor
Had someone send this to me and it’s just too cute not to pass on, especially in this day and age of computers!
A little boy goes to his father and asks ‘ Daddy, how was I born ?’
The father answers, ‘Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo . Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, and googled each other. There your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive . As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall , and since it was too late to hit the delete button , nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared that said:
Scroll down…You’ll love this …….
‘You got Male!
Unbelievable!
It would almost be unbelievable… except it did happen… so I guess that makes it believable LOL So you know I had that big storm hit my house in January and cause thousands of dollars worth of damage. Well the way the insurance works, is they pay you the first 90% in a check to get all the repairs done. Then you submit all your receipts showing you did in fact get the work done (and didn’t just pocket the money)…. then they issue you the final 10% depreciation check.
So… tell me if this strikes you as a bit odd and unbelievable LOL The claim was on my current house… the first check was mailed to my current house… all the work receipts show the work was done at my current house…
Yet…. they mail the final check to my old house which I haven’t lived at for 8 years. WTF? Are you kidding me LOL So now I get to wait another 7 to 10 business days to get the correct check. I was actually chuckling today over this current problem… it was just so unbelievable 
Hope you got a laugh out of how stupid this company has been…
Faith xoxo
Rebecca’s Fearless Basketball Playoff Prediction
We all know who the “King” is of basketball is these days. And we all know that behind every king is an equally powerful queen. So with the playoffs under way shall we have that debate? In fact, being from Ohio, you know who I am rooting for this year. We know who the real MVP is. And I would make a pretty good queen to crown him! Now the question is who do you think will be the team that they will demolish? I have an idea. I’ll give you a hint. I’m wearing their cheerleader uniform in this pictorial. It’s probably not who you think it is. You know what they say about the professional basketball playoffs. It’s where ‘Mazin’ Happens…(or something like that)..well that is what happens in my office too!
Do you like basketball? Well come on in to my indoor court and let me show you a few tips about this year’s basketball playoffs. I’ll help give you tips on who I think will win it all. Well you know that already so I will tell you who they will beat to get that elusive trophy! Come on in! Its a Slam Dunk!
Arizona: The Meth Lab of Democracy?
Is Arizona the meth lab of democracy?
Jon Stewart’s take on the new Arizona Immigration Law.
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon – Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| Law & Border | ||||
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Bow Hunting!
I’m sure some of you are aware that my husband is an avid hunter – usually he’s a gun/dog hunter but he has always had a bow and hunted that way as well.
He just got a new bow over the weekend and is looking at different accessories, etc on the net.
So here’s the question: does ANYONE even see the bow in this pic? I know I didn’t!
Kristine Cumz
Jon Stewart Makes Fun of Glenn Beck
Last nights The Daily Show with Jon Stewart does a 10 minute skit on how Glenn Beck’s portrayal of Progressivism is cancer. It’s fucking hilarious and shows how insane Glenn Beck is.
Take the time to watch it’s brilliant!
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon – Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| Intro – Progressivism Is Cancer | ||||
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| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon – Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| Conservative Libertarian | ||||
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